First - THANK YOU - to each of you who have been so kind to send such supportive comments in the past few days. Each one was very much appreciated.
During the years when I taught management and motivational classes in a corporate setting, I often used the terms coined by psychologists known as an "external locus of control" and an "internal locus of control."
Basically, a number of studies have shown that individuals who believe life is "what happens to them",or "they did to me", or "I had no choice-it was forced upon me" - that type of thinking is called having an external locus of control. Such people think that your life is controlled by events outside of yourself and beyond your control.
To be sure, there is some basis in fact for such views, but taking them to such extremes leaves a person seeing themselves as nothing more than a victim in life. Or some sort of hapless martyr.
Those who tend to hold an internal locus of control believe that life is a series of choices and that the sum total of those choices largely determines the quality of one's life.
Certainly "things happen" to each of us in life that we would have rather avoided. But as the saying goes, "It is not what happens to you, but how you choose to respond to what happens, that makes all the difference."
For many years I kept a little sign in on my office wall that read:
Choices create habits
Habits create patterns
Patterns determine my success or failure in life
The choice is up to me.
Thus, despite setbacks, problems, and pitfalls we can choose to have an attitude of gratitude - or not. The choice really is up to each of us.
Hope your day is full of good things, and good choices. Until next time ...Marsha